“Let me just check with her sister…”
I hear this so often (replace “sister” with “best friend/mother/daughter/housekeeper/etc.”) – from young men, grown men, newly weds or long standing partners. There is no rule, no standard, no set frame to determine the kind of guy who will default to it. Some of you seem to get into a state of panic, frozen mind, lost at sea when it comes to picking a personal gift for your girl.
So, here are a few tips to help you gain confidence — it’s very easy. All you have to do is observe her for a couple of weeks and ask yourself a few questions:
Is she wearing jewelry other than her wedding/engagement/commitment ring and her watch? Some women don’t or very little of it; either because they don’t like or it does not fit their lifestyle. If that’s the case, she is not going to enjoy a large necklace or dangly earrings. Studs, a delicate chain or a simple band will be perfect. If she is wearing jewelry: are they long or short necklaces? Lots of bracelets stacked up? Dangly earrings or close to the face?
Gold or silver? Women have very specific ideas about that – no point fighting it, go with the flow.
What’s the color of her closet? All black? Black/grey/white? Lots of color? Make a note of it (or take a photo) so you can pick an accessory that works well with it. Everything goes with black and she might enjoy a pop of color with a scarf or an umbrella. If she prefers monochrome outfits, stay in her color range. If she loves color, find the one that seems to dominate her closet.
Ah… the handbag conundrum. Nothing more fab than a guy who gives a handbag — it requires a lot of chutzpah but you can score a lot of points if you get it right. Women rarely give themselves permission to spend thousands on a handbag. So go for it. But do your research first: Is she wearing her bag at the shoulder or at the hand? Big bag or small bag? Lots of pockets inside or just a big bucket? With a lot of hardware (buckles, chains, etc.) or pared down? If it’s your first handbag purchase, go for black.
A beautiful gift wrap and (if you can) some flowers will make a huge difference to how your gift is received.
At the end of the day, what is it that we want in a gift? We want surprise, thoughtfulness and love — show us that you went all out for us — and then all is forgiven.
Happy shopping gentlemen.